Moving in with your boyfriend or girlfriend for the first time is a relationship defining moment.
When you and your other half decide to move in together, you can find yourself on a love buzz. You imagine cute nights in cooking together, endless sex marathons and nightly sleepovers with your favourite person. Making the move to shared domesticated bliss may seem like it's all sunshine and rainbows, but it's not without its share of challenges.
Like any significant life change, there is an adjustment period that you will both go through when you first move in together. For many, this adjustment can come as a shock and will be totally unexpected. To help prepare you for the inevitable, I've rounded up the main things to expect when you move in together for the first time.
A whole lot of staying in
Say goodbye to romantic dates and wild nights out and say hello to your new friend Netflix. When you first move in together, it's way more convenient to stay put in your new home every evening. Why would you possibly leave your new love nest to go to a noisy bar? Or spend hours getting dolled up, when you can cuddle on the couch in your PJs? Yes, you have become THAT boring couple you used to bitch about; embrace it.
Changes in your sex life
Before moving in together, you may have imagined daily sex romps everywhere in your new love shack. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but this is rarely the case. When you move in together, you need to adjust to each other's libidos. You may love getting it on seven days a week, while your fella may be happy enough with a weekend sex fest. Many of you will go from only seeing each other twice a week, where sex was reserved for those limited times. When you are around your partner every day, you may realise you have a higher or lower sex drive than you expected; and that's ok. If your sex life (or lack thereof) is becoming a problem after moving in together, make sure to have an open and honest conversation with them.
When you move in together, your finances need to merge to some extent. Money is always a weird one and a topic a lot of us find awkward to discuss. It's also something a lot of couples fail to chat about before moving in together, which can lead to teething problems after moving in together. One of you may earn significantly more than the other, or one of you may be the sole owner of the house. Whatever the case, you both need to discuss how you will split rent or mortgage payments, bills, groceries and other expenses. If you have this outlined from the start, it will hopefully help in avoiding any money disagreements down the line.
You probably never thought you would have an argument with your fella about how your bananas should be stored, but welcome to the wonderful, weird world of living together. Living in close quarters with your significant other is the breeding ground for random bickering. You may never have thought much about how your partner folds sheets, but now the way he does it drives you insane. Likewise, your partner might not be able to cope with how you have so much beauty products in the bathroom. Unfortunately, these little disagreements are inevitable, and you are best just to ride the wave. Try not to sweat the small stuff and pick your battles.
A sense of calm
Despite it sounding like I'm preparing you for a shit time after moving in together, I can assure you I'm not. The main thing to expect is a sense of unwavering, blissful calm that will wash over you both. You now have your own space that you can fill with things that bring you joy and create memories in. It's a place that is both of yours to enjoy and take your relationship to the next level in. The calm comes quite quickly after the initial whirlwind of adjusting to life together, and it's worth going through the harder parts for.