Crossing one knobbly knee over the other and showcasing yet another pair of shoe boots to the world, Alexa Chung carelessly threw her Burberry trench in the corner and perched herself on a chair, a superior smirk playing around her mouth.
"No not for me" she said firmly, waving away a tray of tiny canapes. Very aware that her target was to lose another ounce before the next premier, she had not eaten for five days straight - and it was worth it she felt.
Opening a copy of the latest NME she perused the pictures of up and coming rock gods wondering which one she would select to be her next boyfriend. "Who would be a worthy consort to me?" she wondered. "He must after all have impeccable rock credentials - I mean you don't go from an Arctic Monkey to just any old common or garden stadium filler do you."
Bored and unable to actually chew any food, she thought she would bite the hand that feeds her.
"What is the POINT of blogs?" she wondered in a recent Vogue interview.
I was really disappointed to hear that she'd said this. Yes a lot of fashion blogs don't have any "point" - but do they have to? Many of them may just be collections of thoughts, scrapbooks of looks and collections of the likes of the owner and that's perfectly fine- their sole purpose is to amuse their owner and whoever else wants to read.
The fashion bloggers LOVE you Alexa. They really really adore you. There's a thousand blogs dedicated to you or discussing you and your wardrobe and your makeup, all breathless with excitement over your latest outfit or shoe boots. They are a large part of what has made you as big a name as you are - they are your fans.
Jesus don't diss them. SO not cool.