Hurrah – it’s nearly Christmas! And far be it from be to to be a negative Nancy, but there are definitely a few struggles ahead, all of which most definitely come under the ‘first world problems’ title.
Luckily, the happy times usually outweigh the bad times, so hang in there and remember – it’s only one day!
Here are the five struggles that we could all be dealing with this festive season:
- Your family are lunatics
One of the nicest things about Christmas is getting to spend time with your family and loved ones. This novelty wears off approximately ten minutes after arriving through the door and being given a random baby and food group assigned to your care for the day.
And you’re swiftly reminded as to why you leave it a little longer each time you return home for a visit – your family are complete lunatics. Mammy has bought Christmas toilet paper, Daddy’s jokes have gotten worse and your siblings are all eejits. But wasn’t it very good of them to get you that Nespresso, ah they’re sound lunatics in fairness.
- Stress of present buying
Why can’t everyone just send out a general email to their friends and family with a little wedding register style list before Christmas? This would make life a lot easier and eliminate perhaps somewhat tactless presents such as blackhead removers and key ring tea tree oil hand sanitisers. You really question your friendships and relationships when you have to sit down and figure out what in the name of the good Lord they would like for Christmas.
Does this mean you’re a bad friend/significant other? No. They’re just picky is all.
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- It’s freeeeeeezin’
Without exaggeration, it’s Baltic outside and it’s getting worse.
There’s a 50/50 chance you’re going to be waking up to a freezing cold house on Christmas morning because you still can’t figure out the timer on the jaysus central heating. The only solution is an extra ten minutes in your bed, which is hotter than the sun in some foreign country that constitutes as a duty free region.
- Hanging like a Christmas wreath
Let’s not beat around the bush. Drink will be taken. A wild cocktail of drink that you wouldn’t normally go near, only ‘tis the season and the parents went up north a few weeks ago and RAMMED the car with booze. Champagne for breakfast? Certainly, you are the Princess of Monaco after all.
But the repercussions set in around 10am the next morning, to the sounds of your mother hoovering whist shouting at your Dad for having leftover turkey for breakfast. Never again. Gorge yourself on turkey sandwiches and polish off the end of that bottle of prosecco for the sake of it not going to waste. Rinse and repeat.
- The festive fifteen
Two words: Christmas and dinner. If you’re not eating for two, you’re doing it wrong.
Start the day with an obnoxious-sized fry, plough your way through the tin of Roses and random selection boxes while nervously pacing around the kitchen waiting for the dinner. On Christmas day, dinner is served roughly five hours before you’d have it on any other night of the year. Don’t ask questions, just keep grazing to fend off the hunger. Pile your plate nice and high, seconds are essential and a minimum of three desserts must pass through your lips. Plonk yourself on the couch, finish off the Roses and begin your new life as the fifth Teletubby.
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What other hardships are on the way this Christmas? Have you any tips on how to deal with the overwhelming stress of it all? We'd love to hear your thoughts below.
