Something terrible has happened.
Brad Pitt has gone off as surely as a hang sangwich left out in the Tramore sun. His Brennans bread has curled at the edges and his marge has disintegrated into an oil slick. His hang is tough and leathery and it... well it smells bad if you get too close.
The writing was on the wall when he did that terrible Chanel ad. (That ad interestingly was the most successful one that Chanel have ever done - BECAUSE it was so terrible everyone watched it and chortled and shared it on the Internet. Good for Chanel. Bad for Brad. Read: that Chanel Brad Pitt ad is the best laugh ever.)
But anyway where was I... oh yeah. Here are Brad's red carpet pix at the premier of WWZ last week.
WAIL. Oh Bradicus Pitticus you were the ultimate in male perfection. HOW THE HELL have you aged so badly?
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Look at Tom Cruise for instance. Yes he's a carried eejit - but he looks incredible for his age. I still love you though Brad and I love you even more for your support of Angelina during what must have been a bloody terrible time for both of you. But now it's time to get a grip man. Take it back.
Get your hair cut for starters and wash it.
Am I being too harsh? What do you think of Brad now?
