Kate Middleton's Accidental Arseflash: We've All Got One, Should Everyone Just Calm Down?

A German tabloid caused uproar last week when it published photos of Kate Middleton’s exposed bum on the recent royal visit to Australia, to the sound of the British media clutching its pearls and gasping in horror. An errant gust of wind lifted her swishy dress, revealing her (admittedly very nice) arse, leading people to wonder whether she was wearing a thong or going commando.

The Duke And Duchess Of Cambridge Tour Australia And New Zealand - Day 14

Putting that obviously VERY important debate aside for a moment, an Australian paper then published the photo along with an editorial pointing out that the UK media’s refusal to print the images doesn’t mean that every other country has to follow suit.

It also, pretty unfairly in my opinion, asks:

If the Duchess can't be ­bothered protecting herself by having hem weights sewn into her garments, why should the media protect her?

I didn’t even know that hem weights were a thing, but I sure could have used them that time my dress had ridden up around my bag, revealing my tights and Dangermouse knickers to Dame Street.

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It’s unfortunate that Kate happened to be caught out in such a manner and appears to have no privacy left, to the point that a relatively small flash of arsecheek becomes an international incident. However, I do think it’s a bit rich for the British tabloids to indignantly climb onto their high horse when other countries treat the royal family the way they treat literally every other famous person in the public eye.

The Duke And Duchess Of Cambridge Tour Australia And New Zealand - Day 14

Two years ago, Kate and William sued the French edition of Closer for publishing topless photos of Kate sunbathing at a private chateau in France, which was undoubtedly a horrible violation, given that she obviously thought she was somewhere safe and private. This time around though, it was while the royal couple were on official tour duty, visiting victims of a bush fire, so unfortunately, it just happened to be in front of photographers who weren’t exactly hiding in bushes with a long lens camera.

On one hand I do feel bad for Princess Shinylocks, but on the other I think everyone could do with calming down somewhat. It’s just a bit of bum for God’s sake. You’d see as much hanging out of denim hotpants at a music festival.

Now then, do you think it’s a gross violation of Kate’s privacy or not actually a big deal at all? Have you ever had an unfortunately timed wardrobe malfunction, as they’re called now?

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And did everyone else know about hem weights except me?

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