Latest research proves that he must have stolen this money
This is my penultimate report on the findings that boffins have made recently. My ultimate one is coming on Friday. And when I say coming I mean ... oh never mind.
In a discovery that has shaken my world from its axis and confounded everything I thought I knew about humankind, researchers have found that good looking people are more likely to earn more money. In fact being born with good looks is a bit like winning the Lotto. Not only are you more likely to be successful in job interviews, you'll have more confidence in other areas of your life too and will find it easier to bag yourself a looker for a mate.
You'll be beating them off with a stick and laughing all the way to the bank.
What do you think of these findings. Mind blowing aren't they?